I think I'm still recuperating from my trip to the gym yesterday. But I put in WORK at that gym. 40 minutes on the bike, 20 minutes of the 30 minute circuit workout (some of the machines I just haven't been able to master) and 30 seconds of that machine that I think is the elliptical. I'm not sure if that's what it is...it looks like a combo of a ski and steps. You move your legs and arms at the same time. Except if you are me. Which is why I only lasted 30 seconds. I am ENTIRELY too uncoordinated for that sort of thing. I may only have 2 arms and 2 legs...but they went in 12 different directions simultaneously and I am PRETTY sure that is not what it is supposed to be like.
In addition, I am fat. No..it's okay. That's not downing myself. I am aware that I'm fat. Still cute dammit..but fat. And fat does not handle ellipticals very well. In fact, not well at all. I think my asthma kicked in about 6 seconds in. It didn't help that this really cute guy chose that moment to get on the treadmill that was directly behind me, so I couldn't just fall off and lay motionless for an hour like I wanted to. I had to try to casually turn off the machine and make it look like I intended to only be on it for 30 seconds.
I just KNEW that freakin machine was gonna have some alarm that screamed "FAT GIRL, YOU HAVE ONLY USED 30 SECONDS OF THE 30 MINUTES YOU SAID YOU WERE GONNA DOOOOOOO!!!!!!" but thankfully, it let me get off quietly. Well...as quietly as you can get off while also gasping for air and praying your legs can still hold you up. Once I did..I just held up my head and walked outta there like a DIVA. But as soon as I made it to the car...OH EM GEE...I am pretty certain I died for a lil while.
I think I will just have to stay with the machines that I know. I enjoy the bike..a LOT. I tolerate the treadmill. I will never be a runner on the treadmill though. My mom passing along her huge boobies to me pretty much KILLED any hope for me running. There is no athletic bra that can be made strong enough to support the boobage. It just ain't gonna happen. And I am not gonna be trying to run and getting knocked unconscious by a flying 20 lb boob.
I think I will just have to stay with the machines that I know. I enjoy the bike..a LOT. I tolerate the treadmill. I will never be a runner on the treadmill though. My mom passing along her huge boobies to me pretty much KILLED any hope for me running. There is no athletic bra that can be made strong enough to support the boobage. It just ain't gonna happen. And I am not gonna be trying to run and getting knocked unconscious by a flying 20 lb boob.
Also, I am completely uncoordinated. I know I say that alot..but it's true. As my mom used to always say to me *If the color of the carpet changes, you would trip over it* and it's the truth. I have two things against me...I have walked on my tiptoes since I was a baby and I have two left feet. It really is a not a cute sight to see me trying to do anything that requires coordination. I can dance...but only MY dances. Don't ask me to do something with actual choreography. This black girl has rhythm, but my rhythm isn't coordinated!!
I've been eating salads all week. And drinking nothing but water. Great, just imagine....I take water pills and I drink water all day. If I don't lose weight from the salads, I will surely lose weight running back and forth to the ladies room to piss what seems to be a gallon every 3.7 minutes.
I did try walking on my lunch hour last week. Ummm...NO. My lunch hour is in SC. 1:00 in the afternoon in SC. In the summer. It was like 486 degrees out. I made it 30 minutes to the turnaround point. And then I started looking for a bus or cab to take back. Of course, this being SC, there were none and I had to walk back. I'm pretty sure I melted into the sidewalk. But eventually, I recovered. And since I'm pretty confident in saying that Columbia isn't ready to see me walking through the streets in my sneakers and underwear at lunchtime...I will have to find a better (and air conditioned) place to do my daily walking.
I've been eating salads all week. And drinking nothing but water. Great, just imagine....I take water pills and I drink water all day. If I don't lose weight from the salads, I will surely lose weight running back and forth to the ladies room to piss what seems to be a gallon every 3.7 minutes.
I did try walking on my lunch hour last week. Ummm...NO. My lunch hour is in SC. 1:00 in the afternoon in SC. In the summer. It was like 486 degrees out. I made it 30 minutes to the turnaround point. And then I started looking for a bus or cab to take back. Of course, this being SC, there were none and I had to walk back. I'm pretty sure I melted into the sidewalk. But eventually, I recovered. And since I'm pretty confident in saying that Columbia isn't ready to see me walking through the streets in my sneakers and underwear at lunchtime...I will have to find a better (and air conditioned) place to do my daily walking.
The treadmill is okay, but I just find that I get so damn BORED on it. I'm walking to nowhere, that doesn't excite me. I listen to Pandora and I watch the tv...but I still know that I'm walking to nowhere. They need to have one of those MOM thingy's for treadmills. That Motion blah blah thing like they have in some movie theaters and roller coasters. Let me walk thru a downtown scene or thru the forest...throw in a bear to scare me or a picnic lunch or soft serve ice cream truck in the distance...my big ass would run to that! Just an idea to you Gym Owners. Things to make you go hmmmmmmmmm.
